Domus Aurea: Golden HouseListening to: This is pushing some edges; I'm not quite sure...
Bliss: This coming Sunday, February 8, Marcy and I will be Connie's guests on her BlogTalkRadio show, Dirty Footprint Studios. You can listen live at 11 AM Eastern time; you can even call in!
Sanctuary
1. A holy place.
2. A shrine or box containing relics
3. A piece of consecrated ground.
4. A place of protection
1. A holy place.
2. A shrine or box containing relics
3. A piece of consecrated ground.
4. A place of protection
In the 12 Secrets book club, I am thinking that Secret 5, Committing to Self-Focus, has to be one of the hardest in the book for most women.
It is for me.
This idea of putting myself at the top of the list -- and therefore putting my Work there -- is scary. It brings up all sorts of fears, including the fear of my own power...what I could actually accomplish if I took myself this seriously?
We all claim to want to know our power, but do we really? Our actions say otherwise. We put up our own roadblocks and then act as though we have no idea how they got there. We respect those roadblocks; we honor them. We certainly spend very little time tearing them down or seeing through them for the illusions they are.
Our roadblocks are as numerous as we are: We marry or commit to people who are not committed to us; We buy large houses that we then have to pay for with the hours of our lives; We care more about the drama of other people's lives than that of the characters of our books; We say yes to every question that begins "Could you..."; We numb ourselves with TV, alcohol, food, prescription pills, and full appointment books.
Instead of roadblocks, we need better boundaries.
As I was doing yoga after reading this chapter, it hit me that we need Sanctuary.
I think there are three rooms we need to construct and tend to in our Sanctuary: Self, Home, and Community.
First, my body and my mind need to be the primary rooms of my Sanctuary. If my body and my mind are not healthy, are not well cared for, how can I begin to create anything?
I must get enough sleep, eat well, exercise...you know the drill. We must take care of our instrument, and it doesn't matter what art you practice, your body is your instrument.
For me, leaving my part time library job next week (w00t!) is a big part of this. We are not all the same, and for me, my mind and body need large amounts of care every day. Lots of yoga, yes, but also a lot of reading, prayer, music, quiet. And when I have too many things on my schedule, I start to loose a sense of mySelf. I start to feel a bit thin, ghost like, not real.
Some people need more things to do and keeping busy helps them to schedule in their creative time and get it done; I am the opposite.
The second room of my Sanctuary is our homes.
The other night in my writing group we were talking about the importance of keeping our homes sacred. One woman said she is very careful about whom she allows into her home. She doesn't want anyone's negativity invading her space. I think this is wise.
Marcy and I both do our art and writing in this house. We don't have separate studios somewhere else, so we really use every inch of space that we own. This makes it extra important for us that it all be aesthetically creative and whimsical. Everywhere I look there is something that means something, that has a story contained within. I am surrounded by treasure and by physical expressions of the love and support in my life.
The third room of my Sanctuary is community.
What type of people are you spending most of your time with?
I realized over the past two weeks that I still have a tendency to punish myself with people who are too needy. Who never actually give anything back in terms of emotional and spiritual support.
And yet, I am also blessed by an amazing partner, and I have the people in my writing group -- all of whom are striving to live their dreams and help others to do the same. There is not an ounce of competition in that writing group. We are all genuinely there for each other.
This chapter helped me to see where my Sanctuary is strong and where it needs some cleaning and some maintenance.
How about yours? Are the rooms of your Sanctuary in order?
18 comments:
"Instead of roadblocks, we need better boundaries."
Amen!! to that. I have discovered for myself in the last couple of years that THAT is where it is at. I am happier and healthier (and much nicer) when I am true to the boundaries that I set for myself. There is always wiggle room but I have to be clear with myself as to why I am shifting a boundary before I actually commit to doing it.
Peace~
Dawn
Dawn, I found the last part of your comment very intriguing...when you "shift your boundaries" why are you typically doing it?
"It brings up all sorts of fears, including the fear of my own power...what I could actually accomplish if I took myself this seriously?"
Wow. I had a dream last night about completing a collaborative project that has been put on the back burner (by me) for several years. It was amazing and reminded me that the only thing keeping me from achieving this very real dream is my own fear. Fear of failure AND, believe it or not, fear of success.
Looking forward to Sunday!! :)
This was fantastic to read!
I too, had a heck of a time with this chapter.
I love your thoughts on it, and I can identify so much!
Take yourself seriously girl, you ROCK!!
"...when you "shift your boundaries" why are you typically doing it?"
~~~Blisschick in query to Dawn
Dawn can speak for herself, but it seems obvious to me.
You have composed three Holy Grounds, or Sanctuaries.
1) Within yourself.
Absolutely true for "the Kingdom of Heaven is Within".
In the movie, Men In Black, the precious galaxy was sought or Earth was doomed. The alien, before his death, uttered softly: "The Galaxy is on Orion's belt".
MIB looked all over Orion, NOT realizing Orion was a cat. The morgue attendant saw the bulb on Orion the cat, and her eyes were mesmerized as the focus went into the bulb and exposed an entire galaxy, that you could hold in your hand. I love that representation that something so infinitely large can be compressed to reside within our heart and soul.
2) Your home.
I am in agreement with keeping OUT of your home, not just negativity....for it is a cancer that spreads, but also establishing bounds of protection and safety.
3) Community.
I was glad to see that added. I recall two women discussing with me the prayers they said for Erie, PA all the way up I-79 from Pittsburgh. They told me that as they approached Erie County by Edinboro, they could "feel" their prayers of joy and worship and "sanctuary, if you will" all the time driving up,.... until they entered the county. It was as if a dead hard wall was stopping anything from that point. The work of prayer stopped.
AND, they told me it happened each time coming back from Pittsburgh.
I found this intriguing due to Biblical knowledge of Principalities.....zone of control.
But the essence of your query to Dawn is easily seen in recent days.
Within the Sanctuary of Blisschick, her home, and her community, a holiness existed.
Suddenly, a neighbor faced with job loss, divorce, and no hope, began shooting up and burning homes, and killing.
The police locked down the neighborhood to protect the community, homes, and individuals.
What had been a boundary of holy and safe shifted swiftly into an online plea of angst, discomfort, and plea of prayer for protection.
All three sanctuaries disappeared in seconds.
Boundaries may change swiftly like that, or slowly....as you realize a person you trusted is a liar, and you realize you must let go of the relationship, since sands of deception are not safe to build on.
In Building a Creative Sanctuary, the chief discernment needs to be "what do you treasure?; what are you putting into the sanctuary?".
After that discernment, everything flows nicely for all three locations; self, home, and community.
Adding our planet would be a nice touch to those three. We ALL have an effect on this planet in the time we occupy it.
Look at any generation to see how that has been true.
You could afford a new post on this topic for it is true and deep. To be sanctified is to be holy.
Sanctuary involves not just what you put IN, but what is also moved OUT.
I can pour a cup of bleach into my pool and the water is now pure and safe to drink. But the same cup of bleach will kill me if I drink it. Purity and death result from the same cup. I hope you return to creative sanctuary again.
Wonderful and very thought provoking post!~ I have blogged about this chapter yet and I think there is much to be said and things I need to prioritize in my life. Thank you again for sharing yourself~
Such a powerful topic. I like the idea of putting the rooms in the sanctuary in order. I have realized today that I have much work to do in this area.
Thanks for a wonderful post & ways that you create sanctuary in your life, that also I can use in mine as well.
I've been giving up the needy people in my life - its very challenging but it does create a great deal more room.
What wealth of wisdom and unique way of looking at things! Indeed, we create our own roadblocks, and make sure they are firmly in place. It takes courage to acknowledge that, and after it takes conscious dedication to start dismantling them. Kudos to you for this!
I too used to collect needy people who really gave pittance in return. It was a way of self-punishment, I think; and for what reason, I cannot fathom. In severing these ties, I had to overcome my guilt; but when I did, I think I heard angels of relief singing.
Awesome, awesome post and I am looking froward to hearing your interview tomorrow! :)
I enjoyed reading your post very much! The part about taking care of your body and mind first have hit home. I need to concentrate on that - and stop making excuses. Thank you.
I like your idea of the three rooms of the house. I am working on these rooms, and I think I need to admit that the internet community IS a community. It's not flesh and blood immediate, but it is something to cultivate. although I would like a flesh and blood creative community, too.
One thing I wonder is about those roadblocks. I read once that the blocks we put in our way are the stepping stones we need to reach the heights of our goals. Without the work of breaking down or climbing up those blocks, we wouldn't have the strength to do what we dream.
Really great way of remembering our own needs. We must not treat ourselves with any LESS respect and love than that with which we treat others.
And I loved bit about roadblocks. I see a lot of myself in that: "Golly, that's big, how on earth did that get there??" Flutters eyelashes innocently.
PS: Since I read and commented on this a few minutes ago, I've been hearing Charles Laughton's voice crying "Sactuary" in Hunchback of Notre Dame. Found the clip here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a7oGGP0BWYE
(How did we manage before YouTube?)
It is interesting that often, for me and for participants I see in Hero's Journey, it isn't that hard to find the Shadow -- but rather it is hardest to find our inner Hero, our power, to fully be with it. I never would have guessed that about myself or others when I first started the HJ work. It is akin to that Marianne Williamson quote about [paraphrasing] who are we to *NOT* be brilliant and creative and fully BEing!
Sanctuary, indeed! Though I am always talking about wish I had more space, I am so grateful for the space we do have. Isn't it fun to use every single morsel of space. I love adding to and rearranging and playing on/with my studio board, my workspace, the little altars we have in the house.
You know the other cool sanctuary I found was an inner sacred space. I came to it, not from yoga -- but I bet that is a powerful way to it -- but from hypno-therapy. Specifically in work with Sonja Williamson. She lead me to discover my inner sacred center and then we spent months and month exploring the north, south, east, and west of that space. I loooooooooooove my inner sanctuary. My partner had done his years before with a vision group, so it was so fun to discover we both had these interior landscapes! Sanctuary rules! :)
Miracles,
k-
afraid of your own power? i need to ruminate on that one.
thank you!
What could we accomplish indeed? It is so difficult and yet by acknowledging ourselves, we shed light on the very energies we feed to those we most love. Replenishing ourselves is providing for our loved ones!
--Suz
wonderful post! i love the idea that this chapter brought up the word sanctuary for you and how you broke it down to look at it closely. on thinking about this i realize that my home is very close to being a sanctuary for me - still some hot spots to put out - and that, for the most part, i surround myself with people that i want to be with and who give off good energy. i know i could stand to focus a little more on the physical side of my personal health in terms of eating better, exercising etc but i think my creativity is being nurtured.
i am the same as you in that i can not have too many things scheduled in my life or it overwhelms me. i think it is because my day job is so busy and full (i teach grade 1) and so i want my home life and out of work life to be calm and quiet. i need that time.
your post reminded me of the idea that you do things because you get some sort of payback. that payback may be negative or positive but you don't keep doing something over and over unless it is doing something on some level for you. so i ask myself: what is the payback in not taking care of myself in terms of my health?
what is your payback in terms of being around people who are needy?
interesting thoughts to ponder.
olwyn
Post a Comment