To lose two people we care about in one week has us thinking about all sorts of things, as Marcy has mentioned over at Ordinary Enchantment.
Big Things.
I've started especially looking at how I spend my time. Am I doing what I love? Am I doing what I love in a manner which befits me and challenges me at the same time?
Do I take the time to process things that happen? Do I take time for quiet?
We can do, do, do...chasing dream after dream...but is that what we are really here for or are we missing a Larger Point in our quest to stay busy, stay "productive," try everything?
Just because we aren't chasing a million dollars or a mansion or a car that costs more than most homes doesn't mean we aren't caught up in a chase. It's delusional to believe that because what we chase is "good" that we are "better" than others who chase "material trophies."
More yoga training, more types of meditation under our belts, more retreats, more books read, more classes taught, more classes taken...it goes on and on.
It is good to Do Things, but we also have to just Be.
Here's the Ultimate Question that has come to me over and over this past year or two, especially as we have journeyed with our sweet friend, Ken, on his way to Sparkle Pond (what we like to call the afterlife here at the Lilypad):
If you were told you only had so much time, that your death was more imminent than most of us assume, what would you be doing with your time?
Over and over, I've thought about this, wondering if I would be one of those people who tries to fit in One Hundred Big Trips and all sorts of risky, adventurous experiences.
And here is the conclusion I come back to, again and again:
I would do just what I am doing right now.
I would write and read and garden and take walks and visit the lake that is only two miles to the North. Above all, I would hug my Marcy and all the fur loved ones we are lucky enough to know.
How about you?
If you only had so much time, would you live the life you have or would you change it?
What's stopping you?
(Photo Credit: Christine C. Reed, Scottie Cat, 2009)
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14 comments:
Christine - Yes! I want to talk more about the chasing, chasing, doing, doing at some later point!
This realization that you are doing just what you would do...how wonderful is that? That's the proof that you are living your bliss. Congratulations!
I would live the life I have in some parts. Well, I would live the life I am working toward finding in the next year or so. That means I would quit my job and spend my time doing things that feel REAL.
Excellent post! I've been thinking along these very same lines lately, as I've been hit with much loss this year ~ and held the space for others, like you, who are going through the same.
Why is it so hard to make this stick? To *really* live the way we want? And just soak in the be-ing?
I sense I'm much better at it than I used to be, having had a couple of years now to slow down and distill what is truly important. But something is still holding me tethered down, and I'm not sure exactly what it is (insert "it's probably your own self, Lisa" here).
Somehow, I think it all comes down to a steady income. Money. Bills paid. Wanting to live my bliss and say "F you" to the BS stuff, but also needing an income. I haven't yet found a way to marry the two. Perhaps I'm scared and unsure just how to bridge that gap.
Wayne Dyer says not to let "I can't afford it" to EVER be an excuse. I definitely need some more tutelage in that area!
Thank you for prompting us to consider this question more fully. These days, my soul and body are yearning for me to pay attention and make some sort of leap....I just don't know where to.
Congratulations! How wonderful to have realized that you are doing what you love :)
Always tough questions... haha.
I'm not sure what I would do. probably greive (I know myself) and then... scale WAAAY back with my job. Practice more yoga, travel... I'd have to think about it. I think this question scares me in that it forces me to recognize the real possibility of waking up one morning and realizing my entire life has passed- all the fun things I've wanted to do were put aside for practicality's sake (finances, career, future children) and time has run out.
Excellent post! And question too, I might add.
To answer wit; I would be doing exactly what I'm doing now.
My husband and I were talking last night about "success" and people who "chase after it". But I paused and asked him to 'define' success. he nodded in agreement. In our guaranteed right for the pursuit of happiness, success ultimately is what makes YOU the 'chaser' happy. It could be money, it could be love, it could be good friends, it could be health. Happiness equates to success and it means may mean something different to everyone you ask, but ultimately, true happiness means you're doing something right. Regardless of how large your bank account is.
Great post. I've been working hard on this. There's definitely lots of weird blockages we all have.
For me my TV not working so well post digital switch has been good. I've wanted to focus more on my artwork, and now I'm listening to audio books (thank you Mr. Gaiman!) and stitching an hour or so a day.
I'm also paying close attention to my daily prayer practice(s) as a way of facilitating personal transformation. I think that's something I and many people don't use fully.
I love the title of this post - I just have to laugh it is so true.
Like I've said, my biggest lesson this past year has been that life is what happens when you're making other plans. This year I'm looking to see what will happen as I let go and go with the flow.
Sometimes I wonder if it not about what we accomplish in life so much - I'm talking about that one particular thing we call our dream - as it is about enjoying the journey and the gift of each day.
emma -- what about chasing, chasing would you like to discuss? because I'm up for it! :)
lisa -- ah, the ever difficult issue of "sticking!" :) and yes, the dyer excuse stuff is excellent, isn't it? i am constantly noticing it now.
eco-yogini -- oh, excellent. scary questions are the BEST. get out that journal! :)
keke -- excellent. we are blessed to be in these spots, aren't we? but it's also not just by chance or luck...
carly -- ahh, the soothing, inspiring tones of mr. neil's voice! :) less tv always equals more life quality, i think. and the prayer comment has me thinking...
rebecca -- yep. process over product. most definitely. :)
A HUGE smile rating for this post! (rating based on physical reaction while reading)
I would venture a guess that fear - in some form - is what stops most people.
Anon -- Glad for the smile rating!
And funny...I am working on something about fear for tomorrow!
its really what i came to and perhaps was the biggest lesson of my journey through my grief ... i am living my dream, my life is exactly how i want it to be. i want to continue living it just as i am, doing what i love with the people i love and what i love may change and there may be new people who enter the love but i am really living, involved, aware and that is truly the stuff :-)
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Did you read this post?
http://brandireynolds.blogspot.com/2009/06/my-problem-with-meaning.html
That post and this post weave in and out of each other for me.
Over the last year, I've come to a new place in my life. I don't have a great, concise way to say it, but maybe I am trying LESS hard.
This whole world of authenticity and soul-searching can become overwhelming. Things that might motivate and inspire can also become obsessions that make you more discontent! I have experienced this in my own life.
The Mary Oliver line has come to mind many times (and you know I love M.O.): "Tell me, what is it you plan to do
with your one wild and precious life?"
It's a beautiful line, but it can also capture this message that we hear over and over in the self-development-or-whatever-world. I have found myself getting very stressed in the past about things like: What if my whole life goes by and I didn't do everything perfectly in tune with my heart? What if I was supposed to do something deeper or bigger or more meaningful? My ONE life is here. My ONE PREVIOUS life! Am I wasting it? Every second??
Of course, what it says earlier in that poem is "I do know how to pay attention, how to fall down
into the grass, how to kneel down in the grass,
how to be idle and blessed, how to stroll through the fields,
which is what I have been doing all day."
What if I spent my entire life doing very small things that no one knew about? If I found beauty in those things, that would be enough.
What if I never practiced yoga again? What if I said the wrong thing sometimes? What if I never volunteered for another organization? What if my life didn't have a mission or a meaning?
If I found beauty in my life, that would be enough.
It has taken me a long time to reach this point and sometimes I fall back. And of course not everyone would agree with me.
But I choose not to replace mainstream world's rules and stresses with the rules and stresses of the more 'spiritual' world.
Oh, Emma, I agree with you totally!
Of course, the whole idea of a bliss path is that it is unique to every single human being on this planet.
I think of a dream I had shortly after our orange tabby, Ernie, passed away.
He told me, "it's okay...you could work a little part time job at the organic grocer and write poems and that would be enough."
The specifics aside, I think you and he are saying the exact same thing. It's all about your own version of beauty and in that is meaning.
The "spiritual" self-help world out there can get to the point where they are wielding bludgeons.
I'm all for a little "tough love," but it gets to the point where they are saying that if you don't have every single thing you WANT, then you must be doing something WRONG. That is so packed with the opposite of wisdom that it would take me a BOOK. (Something I think about writing, actually. ha!)
I've been thinking about this myself lately. The mortality piece, how we never really know how long we have, and how that fact impacts the way I live my life. Knowing that, what would I want to change? I've also been cutting back a bit on the doing, trying to enjoy more of the being. Great post, lots of juicy stuff to think about, Christine!
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