BlissQuest: Are Your Own Rules Holding You Back?

Another photo from a walk this past weekend.

Listening to: A musical rule-breaker, a jazz genius, still kicking at 88 years old!

Today's Bliss Formula: I've already taken a walk this morning, something I have not been doing enough of, and it was good to get outside first thing, instead of looking at news and blogs.

One of the things that I have recently been working on is becoming more aware of the rules that I use to govern my life and how they affect me. My goal is to evaluate those sometimes deeply embedded rules in light of this question: Is this rule serving me or am I serving this rule?

The larger goal is to become more spontaneous in my reaction to daily life. To learn that each day is brand new and filled with possibilities that did not exist the day before. To live from my instincts and to experience being born anew each morning. I want to let go of all the "shoulds."

Otherwise, I want to live without limiting myself, without putting myself into some sort of box. In Buddhism, we hear a lot about the concept of "no self." I understand this to mean (after much reading) not that "I" do not exist, but that a solid and unchanging "I" does not. I am always changing and always being changed. I am fluid.

Thinking like this allows me to, for example, accept my moods as temporary. This is important. Instead of seeing a melancholy moment as a precursor to a larger depression, I see it as a melancholy moment -- a passing feeling. Passing. Fleeting.

Thinking like this also allows me to challenge myself.

I could have stopped my "professional" life with teaching creative writing. It was comfortable; I was good at it. Furthermore, it made other people comfortable, because when they asked me what it was I "did," I had that easy answer everyone wants -- "I teach."

But teaching has never been enough for me. I like to do it once in a while. If I thought of myself strictly as a teacher, this would limit my experience of myself as a creative person who needs a variety of stimuli in my life. I am a "snorkeler" and not a "deep sea diver." I need to be learning something new all the time.

"Jack of all trades and master of none" was used as an insult in my family. To be focused on one goal was the ideal and so I set that up as a rule for myself and used it for many years of my life to beat myself up. This was a case where a rule was creating depression and anxiety and deep sadness.

More of my rules:

I am 5'5" and I am only a good person when I weigh no more than 125 pounds. I still fight with this one, but I am learning, especially though yoga, that my body is strong and flexible and beautiful as it is and that I love to eat and food is a pleasure not to be eschewed. During my life, when I have managed to follow this weight rule, it is because I am following all sorts of unhealthy food and exercise rules.

If the house is not spotless, I must be lazy. How many of us believe this? That there are some sort of dirty house police out there, just waiting to come and take pictures of the piles of books and papers and dirty dishes? I have better things to do with my time than worry about imaginary cleanliness enforcers.

The most moral people are vegetarians. I was a vegetarian for ten years, but during that ten years, meat never ceased to be enticing. My partner is a very natural and happy vegetarian. I was a tired and hungry one. Finally, I came to see this as a destructive rule. I still have rules about organic, but organic tastes better, is better for me, and is better for the planet. That is what I would call a good rule.

And there are good rules. But I prefer to call these commitments.

I am committed to my partner. I am committed to clean and healthy food. I am committed to my yoga practice but not to the point of feeling badly if I don't do it. I am committed most of all to being happy.

And so my number one rule at this point in my life is to have fun. If a rule makes me grouchy, I show it the door.

So here's an assignment:

Start watching your most repetitive behaviors and ask yourself if they are based on some rule.

Then try to discern where you got that rule. Did it come from you or someone else?

Next, investigate the "why" of the rule. Why do you have the rule and what does this rule do for you?

And finally, is the rule making you a happier, healthier, more productive person, or is the rule holding you back?

If the rule is holding you back, can you let go of it?

Rules usually originate in fear and constriction. So this exercise is really about opening your heart and your mind -- two places that need to be opened if you are ever going to live a blissful life.

RandomBliss: The Power of "No"

Jobie, who taught me all about priorities.

Listening to: From my childhood, a song all about action.

Today's Bliss Formula: Rain for the plants. I'm back to the library today and there is an event that should draw a couple hundred, screaming children. A candle lit in front of Jobie's picture. New ideas for my novel and other projects -- ideas that made me want to scream with delight!

Saying no to anything that gets in the way of your blissful and artful and creative life is the equivalent of saying yes to that life, to your priorities.

A lot of us have a hard time saying no and perhaps thinking about it as a yes will give us the strength we need to not make choices from feelings of obligation to others or to some standard version of what our life is "supposed" to look like.

I struggle with this all the time. Those voices in my head that tell me what I should or should not be doing can get pretty loud. But I am learning -- especially thanks to that handsome cat -- how to shut those voices down. (For a bit about Jobie, go here.)

Yet the voices got extra loud a couple of days ago.

There was a job posting at the Whole Foods Cooperative that I would be qualified for. And my "shoulds" all kicked in at once:

I could (should) help people more directly with this job.

I could (should) help the co-op.

I could (should) make more money! And buy things!

Underlying all these voices, there is a voice that it is critical I get to and recognize, but it can take a while, it's the voice that says:

What you are already doing with your life is not enough; do more. Making money is the most important thing. Having a recognizable-to-others job is most important.

And...the big one:

Stop trying to follow your dreams; you're getting too old for that. You're getting nowhere. It's time to face reality and grow up.

These voices come from many places, but the important thing is to bludgeon them to death! They are a choir of naysayers and listening to them gives them energy, grows them; they are emotional and spiritual parasites, stealing your life.

You have control over this. But only if you pay close attention to the constant chatter in your head, which is where yoga and meditation and other forms of prayer come in.

Most of us run on autopilot, hearing these voices and responding to them with our very lives but not really listening to them, not talking back, not telling them to shove it.

This is where the idea of constant choice comes in. You are making constant choices, but if you aren't aware of these voices, you will be under the illusion that some nebulous, external control mechanism is making your choices for you.

You will easily be swayed by external forces. You will say you have priorities but you will not live them. You will allow others to determine how you use this only time you have. You will go along with the crowd even when it feels like crap. You will be a sheep.

It took me a few hours, and I almost gave in, but I didn't. I said NO.

Because my dreams aren't impossible. As a matter of fact, my dreams are essential -- and not just to me. Living and being who we are meant to be, living the dreams that have been planted in our hearts -- me doing this, you doing this is essential for everyone else on this planet. The more of us who dare, the more others will dare.

Dare to be happy. Dare to say no.

Be brave. Know yourself and keep moving toward the self that you were born to be.

When people want to interrupt your precious art or writing or whatever time, say no. When an alternative life presents itself that would take you from your dream, say no. When people are toxic to your goals, say no.

If I can, anyone can.

And after I finally said no, I was rewarded greatly by the Universe (otherwise known as the Great Jobie in the Sky). Other opportunities immediately presented themselves that are more in-line with my priorities; ideas came flowing in from the Muse; and an iced mocha entered the picture.

What more confirmation could I ask for than that?

EcoBliss: Keeping a Weather Journal, More Important than You Think

Walking further than I normally would want to,
we happened upon this lovely fern forest.

Listening to: This song, I think, exemplifies how many people feel about "bad" weather.

Today's Bliss Formula: I am luxuriating in the time with my frog today. And in the fact that we have no more trips scheduled at all for the rest of the summer. The only "trip" I want to take is a regular jaunt down to our peninsula's beaches. And a walk to our backyard to sit on our plaid blanket and wait for birds.

As I mentioned yesterday, the best part of our trip this past weekend was the walking. Lots of walks. And the best walk was into the woods. There are patches of old growth forest here and you can feel there is age and wisdom amongst these trees.

During one of our walks, it was starting to rain. This normally would send me running for cover, shrieking even while I do so. Yes, I am a princess. And though my hair is not cotton candy puffy in any way whatsoever and I don't wear makeup or high heels or silk, I think I may melt. I'm not convinced that I won't, anyway.

But this time, Frog pointed out to me that the woods were like an umbrella and I took enough of a breath to realize that she was speaking the truth. So instead of running and most likely slipping and falling, I relaxed and enjoyed myself.

I've had this thing with the weather. I think it's because my father, who if the weather weren't to his liking in some specific way, spent a good deal of time swearing at it. I picked up the habit, sadly.

But being car free has gone a long way to changing my tune.

Also, being depression free has helped. And I think that is a key to this puzzle for many people.

We tend to use the weather as a mirror for our own emotions. So if we feel at all bad and wake up to a gray sky, we blame the weather for our mood. When really, the feeling about the weather is coming from the mood.

How I judge the weather -- as either "good" or "bad" or "pretty" -- has everything to do with my own internal landscape at that moment.

The weather is not out to get you.

The weather, really, has nothing to do with you.

Be grateful for the rain; most parts of this country are suffering from drought.

Be grateful for the four feet of snow; precipitation is precipitation and four feet of snow sometimes closes things down. We used to love that when we were little.

Let me also discourage people from seeing the weather as somehow our "fault." Yes, there is something going on in terms of climate change. There is no denying that. (Well, there is, but if your last name isn't Bush, you probably put some stock in real science.)

But...regardless of climate change, you can't change the fact of the rain. You can't blame climate change for earthquakes. Big hurricanes have always happened. Tsunamis have always happened. Stuff has always happened.

If you're that worried about the weather, stop driving.

Now, I have proof about this weather thing not really being a big deal: I keep a weather journal. So when people say things to me like "GOD! This spring is so COLD!" I can say, "Well, actually, last year about two days different from today, it was the same temperature." (What a pain in the arse I am!)

Or the classic in my neck of the woods is surprise at "late" snow. But I can document that we almost always get a bit of wet snow once the forsythia are completely yellow.

My weather journal has taught me about cycles and consistency. It has taught me, for example, no matter what we like to tell ourselves, that each season really is just about the same length of time.

It has taught me about the Buddhist concept of no attachment and no aversion. The weather simply is. Like much of life simply is.

It has taught me to pay attention to the rhythms of the season and thus to my own rhythms. For example, during the hottest parts of summer, I am not likely to do daily yoga and I am more likely to nap. This is just part of my own personal cycle.

So, try this. I am a regular journal writer -- and you should be too if you are in any way a seeker -- so at the top of each journal entry, I write "Planet," and under that I write a brief description of the weather, and if it is the growing season, I track what's happening in our yard or with the trees.

This is an awesome and powerful way to feel more connected to your life and your community. When you notice each tree, each flower, each bird, you feel responsible for their well being as well as your own.

If anything, when you look back and compare the "Planet" section to the rest of your journal, you might start to notice how much you blame the external weather for your internal weather, and maybe, eventually, you'll stop.

That's when you'll know that true change is in the air.

BardBliss: Rumi & Freedom from Habit

Spiderwort out back.

Listening to: Some Persian folk music made modern.

Today's Bliss Formula: A windy, gray day, threatening to rain. I will appreciate the rain for the ground and the plants and not get stressed about the wee drip we got last night. We have lived in this house for over nine years and not once had a single problem. I will give up the habit of over-reaction and instead remain in gratitude.

From The Essential Rumi
Translations by Coleman Barks
with John Moyne

It's a habit of yours to walk slowly.
You hold a grudge for years.
With such heaviness, how can you be modest?
With such attachments, do you expect to arrive anywhere?

Be wide as the air to learn a secret.
Right now you're equal portions clay
and water, thick mud.

Abraham learned how the sun and moon and the stars all set.
He said, No longer will I try to assign partners for God.

You are so weak. Give up to grace.
The ocean takes care of each wave
till it gets to shore.
You need more help than you know.
You're trying to live your life in open scaffolding.
Say Bismillah, In the name of God,
as the priest does with a knife when he offers an animal.

Bismillah your old self
to find your real name.


Do you know your real name? Are you living from habit and not spontaneous reaction and joy? What comfort is holding you back from the life you could be living?

BlissQuest: 8 Triggers for Centering Yourself

We like to mix vegetables right in with flowers.

Listening to: This piano never ceases to thrill me.

Today's Bliss Formula: Espresso outside in our pink Adirondacks. Today I'll be trying some new yoga (new for me).

I started this week writing about becoming imbalanced over the weekend (which happened for a variety of reasons). I have spent the whole week getting back to myself, doing all the things I know I have to do to be in my center, to feel good and to be productive.

And this got me to thinking about reminders. Remembering to be centered. Remembering what is important. Remembering what we value and where we want to put our energy. A good thing, of course, is to practice the whole bliss station concept by Joseph Campbell that I wrote about yesterday.

But I think most of us need more than that. We need reminders that pop up constantly.

A few years ago, a Catholic church nearby started playing their bells everyday at 6 PM for quite a long stretch of time. This annoyed me. I felt like they were disturbing my precious quiet. But now I have decided to use this. Instead of feeling angry about noise pollution, I give into the bells and slow down or stop whatever it is I am doing.

Thich Nhat Hanh talks about this a lot in his books. At his monastery in France, they have bells that go off every hour and the people who live there stop and breathe and smile.

This is the first step: deciding what it is you will do or think when you hear the sounds that you have designated as triggers.

You could stop and do deep breathing.

You could create a personal mantra or visualization. This could be specific to a current problem or life situation or it could be a general wish for peace and happiness for yourself and all sentient beings.

Two that I use regularly:

May all beings find and live their bliss.

All shall be well, all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well. (St. Julian of Norwich)

What of the triggers, you ask? Here are some suggestions:

1. Beads: Mala beads and rosaries or story beads or any piece of jewelry that you designate as sacred have long been in use for this trigger effect. Every time you touch the beads or become aware of the jewelry, the feel of it is what I like to call your "note to yourself."

2. Statuary: Placing sacred statues around your house (or building actual altars) is also helpful. Whenever you lay your eyes upon them, perhaps whisper a prayer or a wish or an intention.

3. Art: This is exactly the role, I think, that prayer cards are supposed to play. And there are all sorts of beautiful meditation cards out there for whatever tradition or path with which you are comfortable. The key here is to pay attention to what attracts you. When you find something, get a few and hide them in bags or drawers -- places where you will come upon them spontaneously.

4. Natural Sounds: Do you live near water? Or perhaps a park? Wherever you are, designate one of the natural sounds as a trigger. For example, I love the song of the Cardinal and will automatically look for him when I hear it. This would be a good time for me to just be.

5. Unnatural Sounds, otherwise known as All That Annoying, Anger Inducing Noise Pollution: Rather than lamenting not living in the woods away from all humans, why not see these sounds as opportunities to put your practice into play. Car alarms (or "horn birds" as we jokingly call them), ambulance, police and fire sirens, the thumping bass of a tin can car, a dog barking...all of it can be used rather than resisted.

6. Music & Language: If you listen to the radio at all, pick a song or two that is popular at the moment and use that. If you only listen to your own music, you can still do the same or you can pick a word as the trigger, and every time someone speaks it, you decide you will relax no matter what situation you find yourself in.

7. Weather: A lot of people see any kind of weather beyond warm and sunny as a personal affront, like noise pollution in a way. Wind used to really get to me -- who knows why? But now I use the wind. I think about how it is blowing out the old and blowing in the new or cleansing me. Choose some weather and think about it metaphorically. Rain is great for cleansing thoughts.

8. Waiting: We certainly all do our share of waiting, and again, this is something we perceive as a personal affront. We are important people; we don't have time to wait! My partner and I were in an art gallery and the woman in front of us in line was very rude; she gave us that look -- you know, where she thinks we will look back and with our eyes have this whole conversation about how stupid the clerk is. Of course, we didn't reciprocate. When it was our turn, the clerk kept apologizing, until I told her "It's okay. Waiting is one of those things you learn to do as an adult." She was so relieved. See waiting as a message to slow down. If you radiate patience, other people will feel it.

All of these triggers come down to mindfulness.

The mind is its own place, and in itself,
can make heaven of Hell, and a hell of Heaven.

--John Milton

It's your choice. You live in heaven or hell, and it is all of your own making, no matter what is going on in your life.

I choose heaven, regardless of the car alarms.

What triggers could you develop?

RandomBliss: Where is your Bliss Station?

Where I work in the mornings.

Listening to: I went looking for B-52's (it seemed right with the summer weather) and found this combination.

Today's Bliss Formula: Today I get to meet, for coffee, the owner of this lovely looking place -- someone I have met because of this blog. Cool. And then I have hours at the library reference desk, about which I am a little too excited. Geek.

I picked up the most recent copy of Yoga + Joyful Living yesterday at the Whole Foods Co-op, and later in the day, sitting on a plaid blanket in our yard, I opened it and came across some Joseph Campbell.

As you may or may not know, this blog is heavily influenced by Joseph Campbell, as I wrote about in my very first post. (Which had no picture!!? Or differently colored words?!?!)

Yoga Plus quotes Campbell from his famous interview with Bill Moyers in 1988 (watch it. really you should).

As you get older, the claims of the environment upon you are so great that you hardly know where the hell you are. What is it you intended? You're always doing something that is required of you this minute, that minute, another minute. Where is your bliss station?

I love that question: What is it you intended?

I think this is a question we could ask ourselves every evening, to check in and see if we are living our priorities or if we are living other people's expectations of us. We could ask it at the end of the week, the end of the month, and the end of every year. Good stuff.

He goes on to explain the concept of the bliss station:

You must have a room or a certain hour a day or so where you do not know what was in the newspapers that morning. You don't know who your friends are. You don't know what you owe anybody. You don't know what anybody owes to you. But a place where you can simply experience and bring forth what you are and what you might be. This is the place of creative incubation. First you may find that nothing's happening there. But if you have a sacred place and use it and take advantage of it, something will happen.

If these were the only instructions you ever received for living, they'd be enough.

The room in the picture at the top of this post is one of my bliss stations. When thinking about this concept, I realized that we have created a house that is all bliss station in one form or another.

The room in this picture is where I work in the mornings, where I imagine my creative life into being, but it is also where I do yoga. And for me, yoga is my most important bliss station. The very act of yoga brings forth my true nature.

If I am anxious, I remember during yoga that my true self is free of anxiety, that my true self is free. Period. If I can't figure out what my next step is in some project, during yoga it comes to me.

It makes sense to me that my writing room and my yoga room are one and the same. Doing yoga gets me out of my head and into my body where all the inspiration and ideas actually live. I love that this room is on the second floor with a dormer through which I can observe the world but not be seen. And it is orange -- the color of creativity and energy and fire.

Another of my bliss stations, the back yard, is where we sit at night and watch the sunset and look at the stars and sit at a fire with friends. In this back yard, in this pink chair, I can look up at the big sky and remember that my mind is also like that -- expansive.

Do you have a bliss station? Or more than one? If you don't, make one. Find a space. Fill it with things that have meaning for you. Or empty it of everything. Whichever helps most.

Then sit there and listen for the silence. Deep within the silence you will begin to hear your true, honest, real voice. The voice that will tell you all your dreams and how to achieve them.

Or go to this bliss station with a specific question in mind. No matter how heavy the question, hold it lightly.

This is a good place to ask the big ones: who am I? Why am I here? What should I do? What is my bliss? What is it that I intended? Where the hell am I?

Remember, Joseph Campbell says you must do this daily. You must be committed, above all, to yourself and your dreams. You're here for a reason and you must be loyal to that reason.

Joseph Campbell's writings provide an excellent map, but you must explore the territory.

BlissQuest: Love Talking Your Life

Zoe under the air conditioner.
(She has her own; the rest of the house goes without!
Rabbits can't be too hot; it can actually be fatal.)

Listening to: This song's lyrics remind us that no matter what, life is still beautiful.

Today's Bliss Formula: We're going to pick out annuals for pots and window boxes...plant nursery, yum! The peonies and poppies are exploding right now, as are the clematis.

To find and live your bliss starts in the now. It starts with recognizing what is already in your life. It starts with noticing the details. Whether you are aware or not, you have been surrounding yourself with your bliss all your life -- it's in you and it won't not be expressed. You may be ignoring the larger picture; you may feel stuck; but the details, the small stuff -- it's already there; you just have to open your eyes and notice.

From those details, you'll begin to develop a picture that will contain all the information and hints you could ever need to figure out where to go from here.

But it starts right this moment. Look up from this computer and take a deep breath. Look around. What details hit your eyes immediately? What do you notice that is already beautiful? Walk away from the computer and look out a window (if you are not lucky enough to be sitting in a dormer, like I am, or perhaps outside with a laptop) -- do not notice the concrete of the sidewalks; notice the small flowers pushing up between the cracks.

Start making lists. Gratitude lists are great. But start making beauty lists.

"What you want, you don't need it now."
--U2

These lists are not how you wish things looked or felt but how they look and feel right now. So what if the kitchen needs a coat of paint; see how the red stripe in the curtain plays against the pale green of the wainscoting.

We have been trained by a media obsessed with perfection to see imperfection as the enemy.

But a bit of imperfection is where the unique lies; it is what makes us human; it is what makes us individuals.

I have braces on right now at age 39, thanks to the pain of TMJ -- not because I want picket fence teeth. There is a small gap developing between my front two teeth, and the dental assistant said we could ask the orthodontist to work on that. I yelled "No!" She thought I was crazy.

But it's that little gap that will make my teeth mine again -- and not some advertisement for the idea of teeth.

In Frank MacEowen's The Celtic Way of Seeing, he talks about geancannach, which he translates as "love talk."

He suggests that this way of talking to and about your world can reconnect you to that world.

It is not about writing poetry. It is not even about writing at all, though you can use pen and paper if that makes you feel more involved in the process. (I think that perhaps it is my pen that does all my thinking!)

You can do this any time. Perhaps you are on the city bus and it's getting overwhelming, do this. Perhaps you are at a job that is your fake job and you are wistfully imagining your easel standing at home, do this.

Or perhaps you have some time to take a long walk to a large city park. Or along the edge of a lake or some body of water. Or you could just walk very slowly around your small yard.

Wherever you are, try this.

Beautiful is ... fill in with the first thing you notice. Beautiful also is ... fill in with something else. And keep going.

Do this all day if you can or do it for five minutes every day. See if it doesn't change you. See if you don't feel something shift and soften. See if you don't suddenly start knowing what it is you are supposed to be doing.

From a Navajo Healing Ceremony:

May it be beautiful before me;
May it be beautiful behind me;
May it be beautiful below me;
May it be beautiful above me;
May it be beautiful all around me.
In beauty, it is finished.

When we see beauty, everything already is perfect -- just as it is.

What beautiful things have you been neglecting to notice?

EcoBliss: Hinduism & the Environment

Ganesh

Listening to: This great voice.

Today's Bliss Formula: Not going anywhere. Yesterday, I took the bus to the bookstore to try to brainstorm some writing ideas. Sitting on a warm rock, waiting for the bus, I did just that. The bookstore was ... distracting. A warm rock seems to be all I really need.

Last week, I wrote about the Catholic church's recent addition of environmental pollution to a list of social sins and how this was really just a clarification, that being good stewards of the environment has always been a part of this theology if you take into consideration the concepts of greed and gluttony, both listed as "deadly" sins, meaning actions that prevent spiritual growth and maturation.

I had intended to write about many religions at once, but that was a silly idea! There's too much to say.

So, onto Hinduism and yoga...

Nonviolence is the supreme law of life.
--Indian proverb

At some point during a yoga class, most of us have heard about ahimsa or nonviolence. We have read lists of questions about what this concept might look like in our own lives, how there is nonviolence toward others and internal nonviolence.

And maybe this has led many of us to vegetarianism.

But it's so much more complex than that.

As thoughtful humans trying to wrap our brains around this concept, one of the first things we have to come to terms with is that the very act of our being alive results in destruction.

But this is not bad. This is the way of life. There is no light without dark; there is no life without death.

Being a vegetarian does not somehow exonerate you from this cycle. To grow enough vegetable for an entire planet of omnivores to be vegetarians would create mass destruction in terms of water and land usage. It takes so much more vegetable based food to consume enough daily calories to live.

I think, in terms of food choices, the larger issues have to do with where you are getting your food from. Are you eating bananas from Central America or are you trying to eat whatever fruit is in season within a reasonable radius from your home?

Do you care how your food is produced? I eat meat (gasp) but it comes from local farmers who raise those animals humanely and do not use hormones and chemicals to make then unnaturally large.

Also, without meat in my diet, I am exhausted. I was a vegetarian for ten years and I was a "good" vegetarian (meaning that I ate well). But bodies change and I could not sustain that lifestyle any more if I wanted to be a productive and happy human.

In this case, what is violence? Forcing myself to do something out of a sense of "rules and regulations" or being good to myself, taking care of myself, providing what I needed to be a contributing member of my community?

I spend this amount of time on vegetarianism, because I fear it is where a lot of people's thinking stops when pondering nonviolence.

I wonder about people driving to yoga class, rather than walking or taking the bus or riding their bikes or practicing at home.

I wonder about people flying many weekends a year to go to large yoga conferences and retreat centers rather than working within themselves.

I wonder about all the materialism that accompanies so much yoga these days -- the clothes and the special bags -- the accoutrements that show the world you are a yogi.

Isn't it our way of being that shows the world we are yogis?

We cannot walk lightly enough on this planet. No matter what choices we make, there are consequences. We are not all meant to sit and breathe through masks so as not to kill bugs.

But there are really large choices that we can make that would result in really large differences. Choices that go beyond "to meat or not to meat."

Don't drive so much. Try not to fly. Don't buy so much but... Buy local. Buy organic. Buy handmade.

And then sit back and practice the ultimate nonviolence: love yourself, love everyone, and stop worrying so much.

MysticBliss: Ideas are of the Past

Where I will be much of the day.

Listening to right now: This song has been on my mind and the idea that no matter what, it's all good.

Today's Bliss Formula: It's such a beautiful day; it's not too hot or too cool, but just right; everything is still fresh green and not browning from the summer sun; today is a peak spring day where I am...how about where you are? Have you noticed?

Ideas have become far more important
to us than action – ideas so cleverly expressed
in books by the intellectuals in every field. The
more cunning, the more subtle, those ideas are
the more we worship them and the books that
contain them. We are those books, we are those
ideas, so heavily conditioned are we by them.
We are forever discussing ideas and ideals and
dialectically offering opinions. Every religion
has its dogma, its formula, its own scaffold to
reach the gods, and when inquiring into the
beginning of thought we are questioning the
importance of this whole edifice of ideas.
We have separated ideas from action because
ideas are always of the past and action is always
the present – that is, living is always the present.
We are afraid of living and therefore the past,
as ideas, has become so important to us.

--Krishnamurti

Do your actions match your ideals? Or are you stuck in the talking phase of life? What is one thing you could do today to move toward more experiential living, living that exemplifies the person you really are?

EcoBliss: "Return to Nature" is a Lie

Right in the midst of a busy part of our city,
there is a fair and lovely park.

Listening to right now: Natalie Merchant, Kind and Generous

Today's Bliss Formula: My new set up: I've moved my computer to a window in our wee library. A dormered window, so I sit in a nook. One of my favorite things.

Right this minute, I am not feeling completely blissful, to put it mildly. My internet is wonky today, and I just figured out (thankfully) that my feedburner feed has not been working for some time...and now the (not-bliss)quest of trying to fix that.

To add to this atmosphere of frustration, my sweet grey cat is growling at my sweet white cat. It's one of those days...

It's one of those days when many of us start to think about living in the woods with pen and paper, maybe a manual typewriter, and no other technology. Oh! we think, a composting toilet, solar panels, a wood stove in the winter. Nothing that can break or blow up or can't be fixed without a help line.

I hang out with enough pseudo-hippie types and liberals that I get this a lot. This dream of going "back to nature," a dream I have had myself.

I imagine the different person I would suddenly become. A long braid down my back, I would be calm and centered every minute of every day. (Don't ask -- there's always that braid for some reason -- a braid I could never have because my hair is so very thick that it would snap my neck to grow it that long.)

But this is all an illusion. The illusion begins not where you assume, perhaps. It begins at the beginning of this dream: the part where I think I have to "go back to nature."

I can't go back to something I have never left. I am nature; nature is me.

You can no more separate me from nature than you can separate a fish from water...no, more than that...you can no more separate me from nature than you can separate a fish from its fish-ness.

The separation between us and nature is a mirage.
The perception of separation is the result of ignorance.
It springs from the arrogant belief that a human being
is unlike animal beings and plant beings and rock beings.
It is reinforced by the false teaching that technology
has lifted us above the web of life...We do not seek
a "back to nature" movement; instead, we emphasize
the realization that we can never leave nature.

--From Mother Earth Spirituality by Ed McGaa, Eagle Man

This all goes way back, of course, to the Garden of Eden story and the concept that we are bad and that nature is good and that we had to be kicked out. (Pout.)

So then we romanticize nature as the starting point, the point we can't get back to. We turn nature into an object, the "other." And then the real story making begins.

And these stories only enhance our feelings of separation.

But that is all this is -- a feeling of separation and then we interpret that feeling as fact, rather than seeing it for what it has always been -- an illusion and a lie.

This leads to further disconnect. The kind that propels people out to protest pollution, but they get to the protest by driving their cars. The kind that compels people to play the blame game with a government that is not nearly as powerful as are their own personal, everyday actions.

The consequences of this disconnect are pervasive. Just look around. The companies destroying rain forests. The countries fighting over oil.

And it all starts with a lie.

If we are nature and nature is us, then everything we make is part of that web -- including the technology. When we truly understand this, we will then know how to take responsibility for our actions. But only when we get over this lie.

Only when we realize that our feelings are what lead to actions that reflect the illusion that then reinforce our feelings -- a deadly spiral if ever there was one.

Standing at the edge of the ocean, I feel a certain kind of thrill that includes fear. I am drawn to the beauty but also feel a pull...there is death in that powerful water, death that does not see me as separate.

Nature is beautiful and so we idealize it. Nature is also ugly and mean and strong and deadly. Like us -- because we ARE it.

I used to think the Indians were talking
metaphorically about sister mountains and
brother buffalo, but I have now known
the quest and seen the vision. I am beginning
to understand! If there were no rocks,
my body would have no minerals and I would die.
If there were no sun, the plants would not grow,
and I would die. If there were no water, my cells
would dry up and I would die...They have known
that if we profane the earth, we will corrupt ourselves.
What we do to Mother Earth, we do to ourselves.

--Ed McGaa, Eagle Man

There is no getting back to something we could never leave.

When you are walking on a sidewalk today, do not lament the cement but feel your feet's roots dig down past it, imagine them connected to the earth from which you came. Dust to dust.

When you are downtown, do not lament the buildings but see how they sprang forth from earth and from our beautiful imaginations. See under to the good intentions, the human intentions, the natural